Saturday, November 28, 2009

Farzi Engineers "Manufactured" !

Ques no. 7 (a) :- Explain ‘Wein Bridge Oscillator’ . [8 marks.]
Ans:
I. Wein Bridge is an oscillator.

II. Wein Bridge is a bridge kind of oscillator.

III. This oscillator consists of a bridge.

IV. Wein is the name of scientist who has invented this oscillator.

V. There are many kinds of oscillators.

VI. E.g- Wein Bridge Oscillator.

VII. It is known as oscillator because it oscillates.

VIII. This is how Wein Bridge Oscillator works.


Hey, I’m not expecting all my readers to be a technocrat, even if you are not , please give a second glance to the eight points explained above by a so called bestowed talent in accordance to the question set by another bestowed talented professor. Isn’t it humorous. Your lips have stretched to smile for sure. Ha ha ha   
This is how an engineer is “manufactured” in one of the most reputed engineering institutes of the nation. And you would be stunned to know their price value what they possess, once they graduate with this shallow depth of knowledge. Yesterday when I was walking past my hostel notice board, I stopped there for a while seeing a number of red pages pasted on it (Placement office has its notices in red color pages).

Airtel, Samsung, Microsoft, Accenture, IBM, Wipro, Barcalays, Fiat, Google, Indian Army and many more were there each of which corresponded to one red coloured notice. Unfortunately they will be placing the students into their firm with a repute of an engineer and will be paying them a handsome pay package, when they visit the institute in the month of December.
When I say ‘unfortunately’, I presume myself to be an honest analyst. It is indeed the truth that they pay them the salary just because they are the proved talent of the nation as they have cracked one of the toughest engineering examination of the nation. What the HR people of these companies think is : “Even though they don’t know much about the subject , they will very easily grasp the concepts if asked to .”

I am not going to debate over this topic whether they are right or not. But I just want to say that the case is not true with me. I know how I pass my exams here. Yesterday, I had my ‘Cryogenics Engineering’ paper and you know I didn’t know the topics till 2315 hrs the day before. I thought to Google search the subject. The second thought came to ask to some GMAT (I can’t publicly expand it here, it is a word used for ‘ghissu muggers’) for the guess questions and then I would have searched them on Wikipedia. Unfortunately, even Wikipedia didn’t have content on Gifford Mcmahon Refrigeration cycle neither it could explain Stirling Cycle, nor the Pulse Tube Refrigerator nor Linde cycle nor Claude.

God knows from where have these demons come ? ? And also what is the utility of these topics for a Mining Engineer ? Fortunately at that instant I saw Ankur asking one of his classmates to mail her assignment to him. And you know the technology behind this, She took the snaps of all the pages of her assignment notebook by a digicam and transferred those pics to her lappy through a cable then attached that folder and then she mailed it to him. Gmail allows only 25 MB of maximum attachment so she used the inter hostel file transfer software “Spark” to send it to Ankur. Thanks to her and thanks to the Computer Science Department for procuring such a wonderful software. And above it all, thanks to Ankur for his apt timing of doing it.

I immediately rushed to get one digicam and one notebook of some GMAT. But for my fortune, I saw the technology had gone much forward. In the very first room I entered, I saw someone had multicast the whole cryogenics notes on LAN (Local Area Network). I immediately rushed to my room to see my lappy screen and I saved it to the desktop. Thank god ! I got the notes (though a soft copy of 159 MB, a total of 47 snaps). It was 0215 hrs the same day of the exam and the immediate second job was to mug them up.And I then started mugging up those 47 snaps by zooming out every snap on the screen. And you know this night out could not make any sense as in the question paper I answered all the questions in exactly the similar manner as pasted in the starting of this post. Every answer was the same , if one was in active voice the other one was in passive voice and the third one in some other voice.


CUT THIS CRAP........XXX

I at the outset here confess that :

“ Cryogenics was the subject not forced upon me, indeed I chose this subject as an elective one”.

Yes the curriculum of my institute says to choose one subject every semester from any department other than yours. And god knows what made me to choose this one. And I am screwed.
Frankly speaking , I am a back bencher , I hardly even sit on the second last bench of the class, but still I manage every subject. But ah.. the cryogenics was the subject which I could not understand even though I desperately wished it to. Not that I am that dumb. Perhaps the pre requisites of the subject were not properly arranged.

And unfortunately, this f**ked my GPA. And now it will take me another two-three semesters to compensate it.

Enjoy this funny flow chart, its awesome !!


4 comments:

ayushpranshu said...

Hi Ashesh,
This is the first time I am commenting on your blog.
You hav raised a very pertinent question. Are we engineers really "farzi(fake)"? The important point is, why a guy (Ashesh in this case) bothers to point out a flaw in the system that is ultimately going to benefit him by way of a plum job and a decent salary? Also of interest is the moral dilemma he is going to face when he is in a position to benefit from this much maligned system?

Ashesh Raghav said...

@ayushpranshu
yea..
i wish the HR personnel to check our answer sheets at least once...
but yes, after i pass out. lol
:)

Raghuveer said...

i jus can deny many of d statemnts specifd here.
but lambu ntn is gonna change by thinkin...a great topic to blog on but a useles topic 2 discss on...n comin 2 d point of selectn of d electiv...hahaa lambuu i really pity u...thnx 2 ur dept fr givin me such a great electiv...i hav no negativ points on dis...u knw d reasns authorjii....
n ankur bahut sahii bola..u dont hav d ryt 2 talk abt d placements saale...abhi abhi compu bach jaa raha hai...hame bhi jeene dena yaar...aisa mat kar...bande mar rahe hain wahaa pe...

Ashesh Raghav said...

@Raghuveer
i dont know which Lingo has given me the name 'lambu', I'm jus 171 cms.... ha ha ha
:P
Any way, beta tu bach gaya , tune mere department ka elective liya. Ab to bol de, Mining department Rocks !!! ab aur kitne marks chahiye...??
and yes, You "COMPU" guys ! your good days have finlly come as far has placements are concerned. ha ha ha.
Ab tu bhi saans le le....
lol
:)

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